Real Estate Innovation

Steps to building a child’s self-esteem

What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is the collection of beliefs or feelings that we have about ourselves, or our ’self perceptions.’ How we define ourselves influences our motivations, attitudes, and behaviors, and affects our emotional judgment.

Self-esteem is also a key to feeling competent and in control. Good self-esteem can impact future and present success in all area of life. Our self esteem is formed by our primary relationships as children, and our very first relationships may indicate how we feel about ourselves for the rest of our lives.

Enhancing a child’s self-esteem is the first step to ensuring his or her right to personal safety. Keeping children away from physical harm is only secondary.

Positive interactions and relationships with parents, teachers, and other adults is the basis for good self-esteem in children. These adults can influence children’s self-esteem by giving constructive and positive feedback to children when they accomplish a task. A “Congratulations” or “Nice job” is all it takes to build this vital skill.

However, positive comments are not the sole builders of self-esteem. Providing a warm, loving, and caring environment is just as important. Children who are shown a lot of affection can still suffer low self-esteem because they feel inadequate or unaccomplished. On the flip side, confident and joyful children can have low self-esteem if they are not loved. A child must experience a balance of both love and confidence to have high self-esteem.

Giving constructive communication, positive messages, and carefully delivering criticism will lead to good self-esteem. Use these tips to improve a child’s self-perceptions.

1. Use positive words. For instance, telling a child what you would like them to do in a way that excludes words like “no” or “bad”. You can help your child maintain a positive attitude by being positive yourself.

2. Allow a child to finish their own sentence Children begin to feel unimportant if you are always putting words into their mouth. Let them finish what they’re trying to say without interruption.

3. Give eye contact Kids want attention. When you look a child right in the eye, they know you are listening. It gives them the idea that you are interested in what they have to say, even if you aren’t.

4. Take turns in the conversation. Agree on who speaks first, and who speaks next. It is important for parents to encourage kids to verbalize their ideas and feelings, but to also wait for the go signal to speak. Children should be able to understand that if people talk all at the same time, they will end up understanding nothing.

5. Keep your cool. Make sure you wait to talk to your child when you are calm and relaxed. Speaking to a child when you are angry will only feed the flames of conflict.

6. Criticisms should still be present. We should also take notice of shortcomings or misbehavior as we see it or learn about it. Explain why an action is not acceptable, and allow kids to think of ways to avoid doing it again.